The Other Mothers

“No one ever tells you that one of the greatest joys of motherhood is the other mothers.

I wish I could take credit for writing that, but I cannot. I saw it on a meme, and I will probably never be able to credit the original writer, because that’s how the internets work these days. I will try my best to echo this sentiment.

Yesterday, I had the privilege of speaking to a group of moms at a local preschool about how to teach their children about disabilities. I was thrilled when they asked me to lead this parent workshop, but as the days got closer, my anxiety grew. I love the presentations I have been doing with children. It’s gratifying in every way….their questions, their faces, their love for Sienna. It’s a connection that’s immediate. Kids are a wonderful audience.

I was ready to try something different, and what better way to make an impact than to talk to the soldiers at the front lines…..moms. They are the ones initiating dialogue and carving the path to kindness. Would moms of typically developing children want to hear our story and share that information at home? My insecurities nibbled in my ear. It’s easy to hide behind my keyboard and pour my heart out, but to do it in front of people? That was a new challenge, but in the end I decided that the message was worth my fear. That was a great decision.

Sharing Sienna’s birth and diagnosis story in front of strangers is the most vulnerable, raw thing I have ever done in a public setting. I have shared it with family, friends, and of course, all of you but through my carefully chosen, edited words.

My fears were unwarranted. As I looked around the room, I was met with empathy, tears, and overwhelming support. These moms took time out of their personal lives to willingly seek out information about how to approach the subject of disabilities with their kids. It’s not an easy topic to dive into with your kids. So many people fear that they will say the wrong thing, so they choose to say nothing at all. I firmly believe that this needs to change.

One out of every five Americans has a disability, so your child will meet someone different than them at some point in their life. We all have books in our children’s libraries about the ABCs, shapes, colors, potty training, becoming an older sibling, etc. Books open the door to meaningful dialogue. Add a children’s book about disabilities to their library. Better yet, add several. Introduce the topic to them first. You’ll be amazed at their ability to understand and empathize.  

I will have more blog posts coming up with exercises you can introduce at home to help your children understand. I will share the books recommended by my fellow rockin’ moms and myself below. 

If you are one of the other mothers, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for valuing kindness. Thank you for teaching your children about the distinction between empathy and pity, because it is an important one. Thank you for filling this mom’s heart with hope about the future.

Our Recommended Children’s Books: 

Meet Will and Jake, Best Buds Forever
Charlie’s Way, by Lindsay Robertson
You’re All Kinds of Wonderful by Nancy Tillman
What’s Inside Me is Inside You Too, My Chromosomes Make Me Unique by Deslie Quinby & Jeannie Visootsak (Our personal favorite book about Down syndrome)
47 Strings; Tessa’s Special Code
Faith has Freckles and Walter has Wheels. Bud did you know…..
Don’t Call Me Special, A First Look At Disability (my favorite all encompassing book) by Pat Thomas
My personal favorite book about Autism (plus it’s FREE): https://autism.sesamestreet.org/storybook/we-are-amazing/

 

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